APOSTROPHE ALLEY

APOSTROPHE ALLEY

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If you misuse an apostrophe
It's as if you were listed as lost at sea
Or scheduled to have a colostomy
And committed to godless apostasy

THE HALL OF HONOR:

HOWEVER....
BELOW, VIEW THE GALLERY OF SHAME!

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MORE OF THE SAME HERE:

"Others" is plural. The apostrophe absolutely must go after the S. If it doesn't, the noun is singular: I have two brothers. One isn't married. The other's wife is named Anne. (Or the other brother's wife is named Anne.) The word "each" is singular, so you get "each other's" problems. When it's plural it's S apostrophe if the plural has an S at the end. Some people's dogs are black; others' dogs are white. Still others' are yellow. Without possession it would be Some dogs are black; other dogs are white. Still others are yellow.

However, the apostrophe can go after an S with the singular to conform to pronunciation. My boss's car. (two syllables). Or even with "in Jesus' name" (one syllable). "Jesus's" means Jesus is or Jesus has.

Elvis's been famous since the 50s. I wish I had Elvis' guitar. It would be worth a fortune. Some people say "Elvis's" guitar so more power to them (I guess). The pronunciation fits.

A better apostrophe rule to deal with using them unnecessarily is "The apostrophe doesn't form the plural in English with the exception of the plural of letters to avoid confusion: I got two A's as opposed to "As --as in, "As I was walking down the stairs, I saw a man who wasn't there." Two CDs is standard now and the 1960s etc. as the apostrophe has no use.

In Spanish you see something similar. You have Tu and Tú and Mi and Mí because they have a difference in meaning. There is no Tí--only ti or sú—only su.

HERE IS THE BAKER'S DOZEN OF ITEMS THAT GRAMMAR NAZIS USE. IT AIN'T MUCH OF NOTHING TO KNOW.

RAP ON APOSTROPHES

Apostrophes never form the plural except when you have a single letter like A and want to make it plural without having it look like "as." I got two A's and two B's. Now even years are written without apostrophes as there's no possible confusion: the 1960s. Of course, they aren't used to conjugate verbs: He know's* either.

What they're really for is taking the place of something missing of course: can't. And expressing the possessive.

Apostrophes have no sound so in "The Coles are here" and "The Coles' children are here, Coles and Coles' have the same sound.

On my mailbox I can write the Coles a plural name like the Romans, the Neanderthals, the Smiths of Connecticut. Plural names take THE!
Or perhaps the Coles' as its OUR house.

Everyone named Cole tends to write on their mailbox "The Cole's", which is way wrong as the article "the" goes only with the plural. Einstein's theory; not the Einstein's theory.

The problem is that no one wants to write the Smiths or the Coles because people will say, "How are you Mr. Smiths? And you, Mr. Coles? So you get the mailboxes here:

I guess you can say
Jesus'(two syllables) name and Jesus's name three.
Or Elvis' (two syllables) guitar or Elvis's guitar with three.
Perhaps you can decide which you like.

My ear says, however, that you can't say my boss' car. It must be two syllables so you can hear it: my boss's car.

It's understandable that you wouldn't want people to confuse your name: The Coles: Hello, Mr. ColeS!

We salute Don and Doreen Taylor, Steve and Mary Oester,
as well as the Andersons (no not Rog and Sharon), the Caputos, and the Welchlins!

THE REST WE REJECT UTTERLY AND DRIVE THEM FROM OUR MIDST AND
OUT OF THE VILLAGE NEVER TO BE REPATRIATED AGAIN INTO THE FOLD OF DECENT FOLK!